You know one thing I absolutely respect about little kids, they NEVER hesitate to shoot their shot when it comes to trying to get something they want.
If you’re a parent, you know exactly what I’m talking about. And even if you’re not a parent, you know too.
Think about that little kid in aisle three of the grocery store who is absolutely losing their freaking mind because mom or dad said no to them getting that giant rainbow sucker that’s as big as their face and will take the better part of 9 ½ months for them to eat.
And yes, with a 14 month old and an almost four year old, I am speaking from my current reality. Can I get an Amen or some prayers? (Feel free to drop them in the comments. ;-))
For that kid, they couldn’t care less about what everyone around them thinks, they just know that they’ve got their heart set on something, and they want it. And, while they may apologize for the bad behavior, you’ll never hear a kid apologize for wanting something.
When do we, as adults, lose that?
I’m not talking about the fit throwing, having meltdowns, or screaming at pitches that’ll melt the paint off the wall – it’s a welcomed departure when they grow out of that phase. Although, I’ve met plenty of adults who never quite did. But I digress.
I’m talking about that unapologetic desire to have what we want and to maximize our lives.
Perhaps it’s the constant barrage of “no’s” that we face during our adolescent years, most of them justified, that gets us to start believing that life is about getting what we “should have” rather than what we “want.”
But, regardless of why it happens, there is definitely a turning point in most people’s lives where we start believing that we only get what we deserve, rather than what we desire. (Can you recall when this happened in your life? I’d love to hear about it in the comments.)
The Cause
Whether it’s coming from our parents or society, most everyone is brought up with this belief that you only take what you need.
Now, hear me out on this, because what I’m NOT about to say is to live your life as a selfish jerk who disregards everyone else’s wants and desires.
If there’s a pizza or tray full of cookies on the table, don’t be that guy or gal who goes and takes a third for themselves leaving everyone else to split crumbs – everyone hates that person! (Especially if they’re chocolate chunk cookies! I may throw down with you!)
I’m talking about something bigger than pizzas and desserts though – I’m talking about your goals and dreams.
You see, when we grow up constantly being told no to what we want, we start to think that there must be something wrong with that.
We start to believe that life is supposed to be lived based on need, not desire. So, we settle for the job we think we “deserve”, the lifestyle we think is “right” for us, and the salary we “need.”
I don’t know about you, but I see a huge problem with this. Living life that way is based in a lack mindset.
It’s like we believe that if we make too much money, then we’re taking it from someone else. Or, if we desire to have abundant, thriving relationships, rather than these grey, lifeless ones that most people have, that we’re a bad person.
We live in a culture where the status quo makes people feel bad for wanting to chase their goals and dreams and live based on their desires rather than their basic needs or what they were told they deserve.
The UNCOMMON Life
Here’s the truth, it doesn’t matter what your upbringing was or what side of the train tracks you come from, we all only get one life to live.
And in that life, we all have equal access to the ability to live out our goals and dreams and to maximize our lives in all areas.
For me, it took going through depression and a quarter life crisis to awaken to the fact that there is no lack in this world, and that me chasing my dreams was not going to prevent anyone else from chasing theirs.
If anything, me chasing my dreams would probably empower more people to do the same. Everyone loves seeing the underdog succeed.
I reached a point where I knew that I had to flip the switch, and stop living for what society had told me was the norm or “right way” to live, and start living for what I truly wanted in this one life I get to live.
The UNCOMMONERS of the world, those who are going out and creating the life of their dreams, aren’t waiting for mom and dad to tell them that they can’t have the sucker. They’re walking over to that bad boy and taking a big old unapologetic bite.
Putting it all together
The common way, that most people live their lives, is believing that the “right” thing to do is take what you need, and nothing more. But that’s simply not true. You are not wrong for wanting to be, do, or have more in your life. There is no lack in the world, and you going after what you desire most in your heart, rather than settling for something less, does not make you a bad person, and won’t prevent anyone else from doing the same in their life. So, my advice to you is, find that inner child who knew what they wanted and was willing to disturb everyone in the grocery store to get it without feeling a lick of bad about it. If you want to live your UNCOMMON Life, you need to become unapologetic about your goals and dreams. I’d love to read your comments about what dream you’re going to stop apologizing for.
